The Beer Garden: Reason No. 1 to Visit Astoria, Queens

The Bohemian Hall & Beer Garden
29-19 24th Avenue
Astoria, NY 11102
(718) 274-4925
www.bohemianhall.com

THE BEER GARDEN is one of the only reasons I visit Queens. No offense to Ms. Cha and fiance Mr. Blakeman, or to Chef Giacchino, but while the G-train to 7-train to N-train sequence is not the worst of all possible triple-transfers, it's not one I seek out often. Unless, of course, the Beer Garden beckons.

Do not be fooled by other NYC bars that promise such green pastures for pouring pitcher after pitcher. The only authentic beer garden in the five boroughs, built in 1910 and surviving near on a century later, is the Bohemian Hall. It not only remains a mecca for Czech culture but has become a destination point for those who desire to gather in the great outdoors. And get smashed.

Ms. Jeanie Cha, responsible for arranging this particular gathering of former work friends and assorted other individuals, provided the games; the Bohemian Hall provided the eats: huge piles of potato pirogies heaped on sauerkraut, enormous potato pancakes with both applesauce and sour cream provided, and lengths of kielbasas sliced and grilled to delicious. All of this is washed down with glass after glass of the draught beer of your choosing, all them a mere $14 per pitcher at the bar. Drink up!

It was such a good time that Mint and I passed up the chance to go watch Real Madrid stage a 'heart-stopping' comeback against Mallorca to win the team's first Spanish league title in four years. But when Brian and Sophie are attempting to figure out the best way to drink a triple shot of Jager, why would anyone leave?

MIKE EATS NEXT TIME: Yes, and perhaps drink a little less? Nah.

Birthday + Birthday = Broke

Churrascaria Plataforma
316 W. 49th Street
New York, NY 10019
(212) 245-0505

Sammy's Noodles
453 Sixth Avenue
(b/t 10th St. & 11th St.)
New York, NY 10011
(212) 924-6688

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FIRST, to both Brian and Faryl. After the debauchery of the previous evening, the last thing I needed was to get up and head back out for more food and drink, but when you've got good friends getting older you have little choice in the matter.

First stop was Churrascaria Plataforma--"The Steak House Even Vegetarians Would Love!" I'll be the judge of that, thank you. The "would" in that claim seems exceedingly passive. Why not "will," or perhaps "can?" The marketing people might have tried harder here. Anyway, I don't make a habit out of hanging around in Brazilian steak houses, but I might start. I did enjoy Plataforma.

Used in an eating challenge between Brian and his friends (the "ladies" as he frequently referred to them), the idea of a green and red, two-sided coaster to signal "hey, more meat here!" or "please, stop giving me meat!" is pure genius. Brian never flipped his to red, so the parade of skewered meats coming forth from the kitchen (which included everything from garlic steak to chicken hearts) never ceased stopping by to shave off a few ounces onto his plate. And Brian likes a clean plate, so his mission was pretty clear (see photo above.)

He weighed in 201 pounds this morning but was unable to stop by the gym post-meal, so we'll never truly know the measure of hurt he did to his body. But he seemed pleased with himself. That's what matters in life, yes? And I was pleased with the huge salad bar which was by no means limited to salads. Truth be told, vegetarians would like Plataforma. (NOTE: For a good time, check out Plataforma's website, complete with a modest descripton of its servers, or, as the website gushes, "the Bruce Lees of meats."

Next up, Sammy's Noodle Shop is one of those ubiquitous store-front Chinese joints in NYC that I would never have thought to stop in had I not been told to. But this birthday was Faryl's, an old friend of Mint's, and she told us to.

The menu is exhausting, but we were told to stick with the lo mein. It turned out to be a great choice. The noodles were fat and appropriately greasy, some of the best I've had. The bean curd fried with General Tso's legendary sauce was also amazing, firm and cooked completely.

The fortune cookies, however, were the highlight for me. Mine read, nonsensically, "Birds are entangled by your feet and men by their tongue." Big prizes for anyone who can explain that one.

MIKE EATS NEXT TIME: Plataforma was fun, but probably not a future choice; Sammy's, if I'm in the area, sure.